First, hello, good day, good morning, and good afternoon everybody! I have so much more to say, and I will do so when it's time and when it happens, even if it might be nothing in particular. I am currently on my cell phone and am still not used to the Facebook app interface just yet, so my apologies for typos and grammar. Second, I invite you to take what you want and leave the rest. Third, I want to respond to those very few who have not been so kind to me on my Facebook page. That is fine, and I forgive you. I appreciate you, in fact, and to an extent I love you. You're welcome to unlike or leave my Facebook page, but I will not ban you.
I have been awake for four days straight now and working hard on many projects and on my fight with my very mature health conditions. I think that we all as humans can relate to this in some way or not. I have only one goal these days for anything that I write, whether the books that people pay for or this kind of free material. The truth. I don't care about money. I don't need likes. I don't need followers. I don't need appreciation. However, I have to write. Love me, hate me, or simply leave me, I post only what I feel is the brutal truth, which includes negative posts as well as positive ones.
I could lose everything at the drop of a hat. I understand that I have things under control overall. I have the help of money from a very large estate that has been used to set up a private psychiatric hospital setting for me. I have the ability to afford that. That is something to be very grateful for.
Forgive me. I'm not upset with you. I've just been awake for a long time. I'm working on a great deal of things while manic. I have nothing to lose. I just want to thank you all for your likes and comments—especially your comments and messages supporting and encouraging me. You have all been in your own way a sincere and solid rock of support—what I like to call my trapeze net. I feel I can count on you. I’m not here to slander or to hate—nothing like that. If anything, I end up hating myself. Again I post what I want, how I feel, and what I believe in—literally whatever is going on in my life at any given current moment. It's off-the-cuff rock and roll, raw and candid, and I am an open book.
I have nothing to lose when it comes down to it. Besides, I have already lost everything over and over again. I went from living in a $75 million house to being homeless. That is not a delusion. Go ahead and judge me, if you wish. I want to thank you all for everything that you have been doing for me. My Facebook page has been turning out so differently from what I otherwise would have expected. I used to be very active on Twitter. I lost a great deal, having been hacked once—rather, twice—I'm sorry anyway. I tried to get back to everyone I could, and honestly I can't keep it up.
I want to thank you all for keeping up with me. We all live our own lives. We all live through our own battles. We all come through in the end, no matter what happens to us. OK? No matter what happens to us. Yes, I've been through a great deal. I continue to go through a great deal. When I say I have nothing to lose, I say it because that is how I know for a fact that I am able to post and write whatever I like—and that is exactly and precisely what I do. This has always been my goal since I began writing as a child—for example, my first book of 25 pages published when I was five-years old. My moods, my symptoms, myself, my sense of identity if that makes sense—these change like a chameleon, coming back and forth, blah, blah, blah. Jonathan (me).
I could go on and on, but this is a post about being grateful to each and every one of you. I am voice texting this on my iPhone, but I hope it reaches the right people. I do really appreciate that the majority of you have stayed with me. I always feel the need to apologize. That's just me. I feel a bit aggressive right now, but what is going on is actually something passionate. I'm passionate about health. I'm passionate about recovery. I'm passionate about trying my best to get back to being 30 years old again, as my life has been cut short due to certain physical issues that I don't post much about at all.
To be plain and simple, thanks to each and every one of you. To those of you who leave, I learned from you more than you might ever imagine. Thank you, guys, again. Enjoy the day. Onward bound!
P.S. I did some writing therapy to get through a rather psychotic morning. I intend to post some of it soon if I am able. My day is rather booked with meetings and doctor visits—again living through another day… There is, of course, more to come. This is all coming from your friend and partner in life online through thick and thin. Can I kick this? Yes I can. Overall. In the meantime, each of us fight our own battles and in a way are trying to save our own lives in some way or another. Let’s keep doing this. What do you say?
— Jonathan Harnisch